Saturday, March 18, 2006

Hellena's Weekend Weirdness Roundup

Hellena has decided to try for a weekly roundup of miscellaneous tidbits every week. This will be installment #2:

• A list of the Top 10 Best Accidental Discoveries. Viagra, LSD, and Silly Putty all made the cut.
• Man cold cocks cops with his own severed penis. Think he misunderstood the penal code?
• Oh fer crying out loud in a bucket. Fuck Starcast Productions for selling out the soul of rock and roll by trying to contact John Lennon's spirit in a Pay-Per-View seance. Is there no decorum?
• Guess what? White, highly-refined breads makes people fat! Next thing they'll be telling us sodas are not good for us.
• Enterprising entrepreneurs find a safe way for cancer patients to use medicinal marijuana, but are arrested as drug dealers. Go figure.
• Fifteen year old school vandals get a bum rap. That'll teach 'em.
• Two founders of the Cryonics Movement are cremated after a freezer mishap. Whoops!! I hate it when that happens.
• Another reason why Tom Cruise is an irrelevant doucherocket. Watch the episode here.

Random Cool Quote of the Week
"A lot of Christians wear crosses around their necks. You think when Jesus comes back, he ever wants to see a fucking cross? Kind of like going up to Jackie Onassis with a rifle pendant on, you know." - Bill Hicks, comic extroidinaire


Wear this to the next pro-life rally you protest:
May the fetus you save be a Black Gay Wiccan Democrat


"a conscientious employee ... active in church"

Well it's a good damned thing he cared so much about his job..... Hellena would hate to think what horrors he would have perpetrated if he didn't give a shit.
SAN DIEGO (AP) - Camera phones are now banned at the Children's Hospital and Health Center's convalescent unit. The curtains around patients must be left open most of the time. And administrators are considering installing security cameras in patients' rooms.

The precautions were prompted by one man: Wayne Albert Bleyle, a respiratory therapist accused of molesting brain-damaged, comatose boys and girls, taking cell-phone photos of himself in the act, and posting them on the Internet.

``This is the worst case of child molestation imaginable,'' prosecutor Laura Gunn said in court last week. ``I don't know if we've ever seen a case like it before where the victims were so vulnerable.''

Bleyle, 54, is in jail on $5 million bail after pleading not guilty to two counts of child molestation and 24 counts of child pornography. But Gunn said Bleyle molested many more patients over the past decade, preying on the hospital's weakest of the weak, including youngsters who would never be able to speak.

Gunn said that when an investigator asked how many children he had abused, Bleyle replied: ``How many snowflakes are there out there?''
Yup, another fine example of a man who is in need of having his testicles and dick removed by way of a rabid beaver that just dropped acid.
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