That's Just How They Say "Hello"

Reuters/Jason Reed

See, in India, the water buffalo think they're dogs.....

"The time has come," the Walrus said....

"To talk of many things:
Of shoes--and ships--and sealing-wax--
Of cabbages--and kings--
And why the sea is boiling hot--
And whether pigs have wings."

Despite Hellena's usual attempt's at sarcasm, she also has a serious side. And a side that likes to read, and give time to bloggers, and editorials from the other side of the political universe. This morning while perusing some of the anti-leftist, moonbat watch sites, Hellena stumbled across an interesting story on the current states' push to ban abortions.

On the Stop the ACLU site, one paragraph caught Hellena's eye:

It definitely looks to be a trend. In my opinion it is a trend for the better, for two reasons. One, it is a trend towards life. Two, no matter what your thoughts are on the topic of abortion, the legislators are taking the issue to the people. Abortion is a controversial topic that finds people all across the political spectrum in their opinions. The right place for this to be decided is in each State, not by unelected judges. These representatives are taking it up on themselves that they are representing their constituants. The beautiful thing about democracy is that if they are not representing the people, the people can speak up and effectively make a difference; something they can’t do with Supreme Court decisions. There is no doubt that NOW, Planned Parenthood, and the ACLU will be challenging these laws soon. I hope this trend continues, and we get this issue back into the hands of the people where it belongs.

Now there are several points in the paragraph that beg to be elaborated upon, but the nit Hellena wishes to pick is the mention of Planned Parenthood. There's no need to write Hellena explaining what eugenics is or the beginnings of Planned Parenthood and its founder because that's not the point of this post.

Anyone know who was named Treasurer of Planned Parenthood in 1942, and then served as treasurer of Margaret Sanger's first national fundraising drive in 1947? That person is none other than GW's grandfather, Prescott Bush.

Well, not that a grandson can't have a completely different view of an issue from his long dead grandfather, but it is an interesting factoid, no? Seems at one time, the Bush family might have supported the idea of eugenics.

Technorati Tags: Bush Abortion Politics

Bush is a Saint

President George W. Bush was scheduled to visit the Methodist Church outside Washington. Karl Rove made a visit to the Bishop and said to him, "We've been getting a lot of bad publicity among Methodists because of Bush's position on stem cell research, the War, and such. I'll gladly make a contribution to the church of $100,000 if during your sermon, you'd say the
President is a saint."

The Bishop thinks it over for a few moments and says, "The Church is in desperate need of funds. I will do it."

Bush pompously shows up that following Sunday, looking especially smug, sneering for his photo ops, while strutting his way, cowboy-style, into the church.

As the sermon starts, the Bishop begins his homily: "George Bush is a petty, self-absorbed hypocrite as well as a nitwit. He is a liar, a cheat, probably still a drunk, and a low-intelligence sneaky weasel. He has lied about his military record, and then had the gall to put himself in uniform on a military jet, landing on a carrier, and then posing before a banner stating 'Mission Accomplished."

"He invaded a country for oil and money, all the while lying to the American people about the war, with nary a care for the thousands of lives it has taken and continues to take. He is the worst example of a Methodist I've ever personally known or known of."

"But compared to Dick Cheney, George Bush is a blessed saint."

Technorati Tags: Bush humor politics

When Little League Sports Turns Bad....

A Little League baseball coach in Miami, Fla., is recovering Monday after being stabbed by a fan, Local 6 News reported Sunday night.

A baseball coach in Miami, Fla., is stabbed by a fan during a game.
A witness said the boyfriend of one of the player's mother was yelling at the coach during the game because he didn't agree with a decision.

Mmm-mokay. So this is how we teach the children to play well with others. What sad commentary on anger management.

Technorati Tags: Anger Management News sports

Just a Thought......

Since so many others are posting the details over the port deal on other blogs, Hellena just has this to say:
After five very long years of elevated security levels, fear-mongering, and a war with an Arab country, is it any wonder that so many Americans are voicing concerns about the UAE deal to purchase the rights to operate 21 major ports in the United States? See, Aesop has this little story called The Boy Who Cried Wolf - if there is nothing to fear in making a deal with the UAE, have all the cries of "terrorist" been a lie all along? If so, then here's where the moral of the story comes in - "no one believes liars, even when they're telling the truth."

Technorati Tags: Bush UAE politics

"Pot?, Hey, this is the Kettle..."

This past weekend, US Ambassador to the United Nations John Bolton declared that the world body is hobbled "by bad management, by sex and corruption" and a lack of confidence in its ability to carry out missions.

Ummmmm. hey Johnny-Boy, some of us have not forgotten about Hustler publisher Larry Flynt publishing allegations that you forced your first wife, Christina Bolton, to engage in group sex at Plato's Retreat, a New York sex club popular in the late 1970s and early 1980s. Not that Hellena has a problem with group consensual sex, but that it seems a wee bit hypocritical for you to be pointing out the kinks in other folks sex lives.

Whatsamatta, JB? Were you not invited to the United Nations last orgy? They won't let you play in any reindeer games? Maybe it is your bad temper or your previous declarations that "there is no United Nations," just an international community that occasionally "can be led by the only real power left in the world -- and that's the United States."

Dress Like a Douchebag Day Unsuccessful in FL

(Photo JULIE FLETCHER/ORLANDO SENTINEL)

Residents of Orlando sent members of the neo-Nazi National Socialist Movement packing more than 90 minutes earlier than the white Hitler-wannabees intended. Counterprotestors overwhelmingly outnumbered the hate group, drowning out their rally at the end of the march outside the federal courthouse.

More than 500 counterprotestors showed up to protest the approximately 30 NSM marchers, while more than 300 officers from several agencies, including the Orange and Osceola sheriffs' offices were employed at a cost of "tens of thousands" to prohibit violence. Although 17 people were arrested, there were no officers hurt during the short event.

One white supremecy web site member commented in regards to the fights and arrests, "...They said two were NS supporters and were arrested for fighting. I think the Communists brought the fight on though. Of course, none of the media revealed that many of the protesters were communists and gays."

Yeah.

Hey you misguided homophobic racist miscreants, are ya too whacked to realize that when you have 500 protestors show up to drown out yer 30 goose stepping comrades in stupidity that maybe, just maybe the human race has just evolved beyond your particular brand of hate?

G'nite Barn........

Thanks for the laughs, man. We'll miss ya down here.

Bollocks to the Hall of Fame

Now THAT'S punk! Hellena applauds the Sex Pistols for keepin' true to their punk roots. Way to go, blokes!

Apparently Due to a Shortage of Real Terrorists....

...rock musicians have now become a target for security concerns. On January 30, Henry Rollins was approached by an Aussie anti-terrorism worker who informed him that his choice of reading material had prompted an anonymous report to the agency. Henry's account is priceless.

“I was reading a book called Jihad by Ahmed Rashid which is a history of Central Asia. I didn't speak to the man next to me past how do you do. I think Ahmed Rashid is published by Yale University Press. Bush's alma mater. Please tell your government and everyone in your office to go fuck themselves. Tell them twice. If your boss is looking for something to do, you can tell him I suggest he go fuck himself. Baghdad's safer than my hometown and your PM is a sissy. You have a nice night.”

And in this week's news, singer Morrissey was questioned to see if he was a threat to U.S. or British national security. Who's next? Maybe Marilyn Manson for his, ooooooh, dark portrayal of Lewis Carroll's Phantasmagoria? Hey Brian, you might want to make sure you don't use the word "bomb" any where in the production, ya hear?

Why Ann Coulter is a Parody of Herself

Unable to respond civilly to protests at her recent Indiana University speaking engagement, Ann Coulter managed to cross over from humor to bad taste when she addressed one young man as "gay boy." This was immediately defended by the IU College Republican President who stated what the rest of us have known for a long time; Coulter is to be viewed as entertainment material only. The exchange:

During her question-and-answer session, Coulter responded to both fans and protesters. One comment that drew strong audience reactions came from a young man who asked her if she didn't like Democrats, wouldn't it just be better to have a dictatorship? Coulter responded with a jab at the way the student talked.

"You don't want the Republicans in power, does that mean you want a dictatorship, gay boy?" she said.

IU College Republicans President Shane Kennedy defended Coulter's comments by stressing that the speech was for entertainment and attendees should have expected Coulter to say controversial comments.

"I think the guy could have been more respectful to her," he said. "I mean, we already know that she was going to be controversial and she was just saying what people were thinking. If you are going to talk like you are gay, then Ann Coulter is going to call you gay. Of course, she said it in a spiteful tone, but it was expected.",

Ah, that makes Hellena feel all warm and fuzzy inside.

Also during the "speech" Coulter raised some controversy when she sputtered the phrase, "brown boys." Since the Rude Pundit already has a delightful dissertation on Coulter's inability to not be a racist cunt.

Sudan man forced to 'marry' goat

From the "You just can't make this shit up" file -

A Sudanese man has been forced to take a goat as his "wife", after he was caught having sex with the animal.
The goat's owner, Mr Alifi, said he surprised the man with his goat and took him to a council of elders.

They ordered the man, Mr Tombe, to pay a dowry of 15,000 Sudanese dinars ($50) to Mr Alifi.

"We have given him the goat, and as far as we know they are still together," Mr Alifi said.

Mr Alifi, Hai Malakal in Upper Nile State, told the Juba Post newspaper that he heard a loud noise around midnight on 13 February and immediately rushed outside to find Mr Tombe with his goat.

"When I asked him: 'What are you doing there?', he fell off the back of the goat, so I captured and tied him up".

Mr Alifi then called elders to decide how to deal with the case.

"They said I should not take him to the police, but rather let him pay a dowry for my goat because he used it as his wife," Mr Alifi told the newspaper.

Hellena will let the reading audience come up with their own punch line for this one.

Sometimes Hellena Just Wants to Scream...

In a statement released this afternoon in regards to the Mosque bombing in Iraq, Preznit Chimperor had the following to say:

"The act was an evil act," Bush said. "The destruction of a holy site is a political act intending to create strife. So I am pleased with the voices of reason that have spoken out. And we will continue to work with those voices of reason to enable Iraq to continue on the path of a democracy that unites people and doesn't divide them."

He said the United States was serious in its commitment to help rebuild the Golden Mosque.

"We understand its importance to Iraqi society and we want to stand side by side with the government in making sure that beautiful dome is restored," Bush said.

Well, let's see.... America is completely divided in how we feel about the Bush administration, but we're going to teach another country that has been involved in internal social conflicts for many years how to unite? And on top of that, we're gonna fix their purty mosque while one of our largest cities, and the adjoining areas putrifies and rots from a hurricane that hit 6 months ago? Brilliant, just brilliant.....

Dick Chaney Quail Hunt Game

Watch the birdie!!

Cheney Was Hunting Illegally....

Ya just can't make this shit up...

Neither Vice President Dick Cheney nor the hunting partner he accidentally shot last weekend purchased the $7 hunting stamps required under state law, Texas Parks and Wildlife officials said Monday.
A blast from Mr. Cheney's shotgun wounded Austin lawyer Harry Whittington in the face, neck and chest. The wounds were not life-threatening. In its report, the state agency that oversees hunting and fishing said it found neither Mr. Cheney nor Mr. Whittington had purchased the game bird stamp required to hunt quail in Texas. Both had valid hunting licenses, Mr. Cheney's a non-resident license.

The story just gets better & better.............

Black, Black Like My Soul....

Or a better title might be, "This Should Be Interesting."

BERLIN (AFP) - Gothic US rocker Marilyn Manson announced at the Berlin Film Festival that he plans to direct a film based on the diary of Lewis Carroll in which he will play the part of the writer of "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland".

Manson, his hair jet-black and his face painted a deathly white, said he wanted to show the dark obsessions of the Victorian author rather than make a period film because that would be "boring".

"It is very much about his obsessions, not so much about the Victorian era. There will be sex," he told reporters.

"Dead Eye" Dick Cheney Roundup

Picture from bushandcheneysuck.com/
And the hilarity ensues....
Best Headline goes to WTF Is It Now?: Dick shoots load in man's face
Brad Blog reports Whittington actually in ICU
Bob Cesca on The Huffington Post
The Dependable Renegadewith another Elmer Fudd picture
Atrios reports it was a "canned hunt." Hey, didn't Dick make fun of Kerry for that?
Fire Dog Lake isn't laughing about the "ladies gun"
CorrenteWire is inspired to witing songs
James Wolcott
even Jesus Gerneral

DailyKos Top 10

From the home office, Dick Cheney's Top 10 Excuses for Shooting That Guy:

10. Sure, like you've never seen seen giant game birds wearing day glo orange vests
9. Warrantless domestic spying revealed he was getting phone calls from al Queda
8. If the Vice President does it, its not against the law
7. Hoping to put him in a persistent vegetative state so the GOP could pass a law to keep him alive
6. Thought he was hunting Dan Quayle
5. The love between them could not survive back in Washington
4. Birds, Cows, People-- with my eyesight I'm lucky I hit anything
3. Positive the guy's family will welcome him as a liberator
2. Pheasants? I thought we were hunting peasants
and the number one Cheney excuse for shooting that guy:
1. Open season on liberals started early this year

Another Top 10 from eBobGeiger.com: :

10. Sick and tired of Whittington’s “Hey, I’m having a heart attack” jokes
9. Pushed over edge by Dixie Chicks and Streisand blasting on pick-up truck stereo
8. Ongoing dispute over whether it’s acceptable to torture quail before shooting them
7. Thought he saw Michael Moore on other side of tree line
6. Bombed out of his gourd on Wild Turkey and Lone Star Beer
5. Companion’s ill-advised decision to wear Moveon.org sweatshirt
4. Was trying to impress Jodie Foster
3. Whittington’s repeated ribbing that Bush is actually the “real president”
2. Targeting scope on rifle made by Halliburton

1. Because he’s a wartime vice president, damn it

Secret Prisons? We Don't Have No Secret Prisons

Well, not any more..... According to this report, the U.S. is helping Morocco to build a new interrogation and detention facility for Al-Qaeda suspects near its capital, Rabat.

A-Hunting We Will Go, A-Hunting We Will Go

"Shhhhhhhh.... be vewy, vewy, quiet......." While quail hunting yesterday in south Texas, Dick "Elmer" Cheney accidentally shot fellow hunter, attorney Harry Whittington, in an apparent accident when he believed the quail to be under attack from Al Queada. Commenting on the shooting, Sarah Brady replied to reporters, "I've thought Cheney was scary for a long time,now I know I was right to be nervous."

We're all nervous, Sarah, we're ALL nervous.

Misstatement of the Union

As amazing as this must sound, the President left out a few things when surveying the State of the Union:

• He proudly spoke of "writing a new chapter in the story of self-government" in Iraq and Afghanistan and said the number of democracies in the world is growing. He failed to mention that neither Iraq nor Afghanistan yet qualify as democracies according to the very group whose statistics he cited.
• Bush called for Congress to pass a line-item veto, failing to mention that the Supreme Court struck down a line-item veto as unconstitutional in 1998. Bills now in Congress would propose a Constitutional amendment, but none have shown signs of life.
• The President said the economy gained 4.6 million jobs in the past two-and-a-half years, failing to note that it had lost 2.6 million jobs in his first two-and-a-half years in office. The net gain since Bush took office is just a little more than 2 million.
• He talked of cutting spending, but only "non-security discretionary spending." Actually, total federal spending has increased 42 percent since Bush took office.
• He spoke of being "on track" to cut the federal deficit in half by 2009. But the deficit is increasing this year, and according to the Congressional Budget Office it will decline by considerably less than half even if Bush's tax cuts are allowed to lapse.
• Bush spoke of a "goal" of cutting dependence on Middle Eastern oil, failing to mention that US dependence on imported oil and petroleum products increased substantially during his first five years in office, reaching 60 per cent of consumption last year.

Though Factcheck.org did not find anything factually incorrect in the President's Jan. 31 State of the Union address to Congress and the nation, they did not some "selective use of statistics," and that "Bush omitted some relevant facts that tended to make the state of the union look less rosy than he presented."

Read the entire report here.